Living in an old ass run down house means having the pipes burst and having no water – can’t shower, can flush toilet, can’t use sink. Yet fucking again. The pipes have frozen and burst 3x in the last 3 weeks.

And for all the people that say “money isn’t important” – fuck you. I hate those mfers. They have never been poor, are tone deaf, And have no clue how much struggles the poor go through every single day.

I know it’s too late but I should have never moved here. My health has suffered so much since I’ve gotten here. And once your health […]

Yet another couple-y holiday coming. After a whole bunch of family holidays during November and December. Ugh.

Life only celebrates those who already are on top- first, those born to good parents, which pretty much sets up life for the child.

If you watch every documentary on serial killers, 95% of them were born either to poor, or to shitty, abusive or emotionally unavailable parents. Usual both poor AND abusive. People who start off life at -10, rarely get a break in life and do well. Economically nor romantically.

Anyhow- Who else is single and alone?

It’s been a while since I’ve posted here in this website. Last time I’ve posted was September 2023. Now, it’s February 2026. I’m 43/M from Indonesia. People might look at me on the surface from the outside that I’m ‘okay’. That’s how shallow, superficial, & fake this world, society, & people are. Nobody really/truly cares about how/what I think/feel deep down inside. In reality, I’m just a loser/failure, especially in today’s ‘capitalistic’ world/era. I’m just a sad, pathetic, useless sack of meat who’s just better not exist. If only there’s an easy way to disappear. If only Thanos’ finger snap was real. If only the […]

Thought I’d share some funny videos:

Food Truck (3min):

(Will list more videos later)

1- Don’t you just love it when you call your cell phone company, get a CSR who tells you one thing, then you call again bc he sounds stupid, only to get another CSR who also sounds stupid, but she says the exact OPPOSITE of what the previous guy said to the SAME questions.

So now 1hr later, I still don’t have any answers to any of my questions. -_-

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2- I haven’t had ice cream in months, but WHY do these mf’s NEVER put any ice cream INTO the damn cones? Anyone who grew up in the 80s or 90s would remember […]

i’m getting nowhere.  why is it that i don’t hold onto the things i experience and people i talk to? it’s like everything passes through me, i don’t absorb anything, i am hollow. it’s a struggle to produce a thought.

on friday a girl at work said she doesn’t want to work in the same room as me because i’m boring, the guy she was talking to chuckled. safe to say that no one wants to be around me. idk what it is about me that makes people not start a convo with me, on some occasions i’ve put the effort in to try to start […]

Is anyone else enjoying her getting publicly dragged?

When she first came out to the limelight, and the very first time I saw her speak in those videos, at the memorial and the creepy one where she’s whispering to his chair – I knew she was a fake ass shit. But at that time, ALL the commenters and MAGAs were ALL vigorously and vocally defending her saying “Everyone grieves differently. “. Which is bs bc she is anything but a grieving widow. It was obvious to me from day one.

It’s satisfying to FINALLY see the public turn on her bc she is SO obvious […]

This showed up on my feed lol. I guess YT Algorithm thinks I’m morbid (which I am)

If you’re into morbid YT vids:
(This is only Animated stick figure)

“What dying from every type of poison feels like:”

Anyone can see a storm cloud over me
Once sunshine and rainbows appeared like new chapters, ushering wishes and blessings

A bridge to nowhere flickered first and shimmers endlessly
what started out another chance is so batten by the torrents of God’s anger toward me, for being… beautiful, i guess
Tempting, they say. So I may never be free

Hallowed be thy name, and thouest may agree,
The cold and the gray of a disenchanted story is every which way
But beware the path of the righteous and afraid
Home is a broken compass… only Jesus calls, compassionately

A crown of thorns makes my eyeballs bleed,

-“Everything happens for a reason”
-“it’s God’s will”
-“it is what it is”

-writes “grabs popcorn” to everything

-“let that sink in” as if your sentence was so profound that it needs a few moments to digest.
-ppl who write out “Period” at the end of a sentence as if that makes them and their sentence more important. No, it’s just annoying.

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What phrases annoy you?

There’s a horror/dark comedy show called Happy! that I finally got to purchase on Amazon that really shaped a lot of my philosophy about death, or at least the way I’ve been thinking about intentional death lately. In the second season they have an episode called “Friend of Death”, because they are setting up a little girl to assassinate a kids show host, but you can’t kill someone straight out the gate as an innocent person, you have to make a friend of death. So they have one of the darker characters take the little girl out and help her kill someone.

It’s just something that’s […]

The guy makes great points about wealth, power, and crime. And a system that rewards psychopathic behavior.

Lee Camp- Unredacted Tonight
The One Epstein Revelation No One Says

http://youtube.com/post/UgkxXsiXqqEzQ3OTPcSq33HmCutTGEicYHt8?si=trk2bHsyOSSKttw4

Let’s air out our grievances with life/humans/society, shall we?

From big things to small things, comment here.

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Big issue- we live essentially as serfs and peasants, just like back in the old days. Nothing has changed. New rulers and new peasants, but peasants we are nonetheless. Low wages, high cost of housing, food, education, healthcare, etc. we do not own anything. Even if you think you “own” a house or land, the government can just take it away via eminent domain, banks via “unpaid taxes.” Private corporations can just burn everything down, then swoop in and buy it for pennies on the […]

Do you feel like life is just passing you by? That every year you get older but yet nothing in your life really changes? i.e. you’re still poor, still stuck at the same crappy job (or another crappy job), still stuck in that shitty house/city/state; still alone (even if you attempted multiple times and have gone out on dates, end result is still alone) etc

Do you feel like trying just nets the same result as not trying? That “resistance is futile?”

I mean we SHOULD try- after all, if we don’t play the lotto, we’ll never win. But winning the “lotto of life” […]

I rarely talk about a popular movie the way the masses do, but The Matrix is kind of like the world we are living in.

Hell, I’ve been red-pilled but if we can’t do anything to escape or change anything, is it not better to just take the other pill and stay ignorant but happy?

Ignorant and happy vs Informed and miserable.

It feels like I’m the raincloud, just hovering over the world and making everybody miserable. Like my sadness and my mess is just leaking out of me infecting everyone around me. I go from just dumping everything to isolating and only one of those options seem ‘safe’. I gotta be so miserable to be around. But I’ve kinda sorta have done better, just trying to process everything by myself. But at the same time, I’m not. I don’t know. I seem to burden the least amount when I’m numb. Even if the few I consider close could scream until they’re blue in the face that […]

I’m in that period where things go by fast. The work week goes by fast but so does my weekend. That’s the last thing I want. To become comfortable with this miserable situation. 17 weeks. I’m 1/3 of the way done. Please please please tell me I’m at least 1/3 of the way done. I’ve gotten a handful of interviews for jobs. I think they went ok-ish. Not amazing, but ok. I’ve felt better about other interviews for jobs I didn’t end up getting so it’s hard to be excited for it. I’ve also […]

Is Equality Possible in a human world?

I am deeply unhappy with humans.
I am deeply unhappy with this world.
I am deeply unhappy with the unfairness and injustices at life.
I am deeply unhappy with all the natural suffering in life (disease, bad health etc).
I am deeply unhappy with all the man-made suffering in life.

There’s lots more but too much to type
-_-